‘Not a Spirit of Fear’: Five Words That Help You Run Free

My heart pounded wildly in my chest as we waited for our moment to run. This was it–The conference meet. The race that would determine if my relay team made the divisional championships.

A girl from a rival school was standing by my side. “Not a spirit of fear,” she said to me with a smile as we stepped onto the line.

Not a spirit of fear. I let the words sink in. For God has not given you a spirit of fear, I reminded myself.

Not a spirit of fear, but a spirit of power.

A spirit of love.

And of a sound mind.

I knew this verse–I had memorized it many years ago. The girl’s five words brought it all right back to me.

“For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.”

~2 Timothy 1:7, NKJV

We weren’t made to live in fear, but so often we allow ourselves to fall back into the trap of our own anxious thoughts.

“And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God.”

~ Romans 12:2, NKJV

As Christians, we have the Holy Spirit to help us discern the truth from our fears.

Our minds will undergo a transformation process with spiritual growth, that we may learn to abide in Christ and bear His fruit (See John 15).

“I am the vine, you are the branches. He who abides in Me, and I in him, bears much fruit; for without Me you can do nothing.”

~John 15:5

During the pruning process, we’ll learn to let go of our fears and instead abide in the love of Christ.

“Whoever abides in love abides in God, and God abides in Him.”

~1 John 4:16

2 Timothy 1:7 describes how God has not given us a spirit of fear, but a spirit of love…

Because “perfect love casts out fear” (1 John 4:18).

This perfect love has sealed the promise of eternity (1 John 4:17). It has given us power over death (Rev. 20:6), that we may have a sound mind about our futures.

And every time we step on the track to take on a new race, or every time we wake up to take on a new day, we don’t have to fear the possibility of failure.

Because our failures can’t change or take away the perfect love of our Father.

Our failures have no power anymore, and neither do our fears.

We can run free.

Courage to endure

In that moment before the 4×800 race, I needed to hear the words from the girl next to me. But I would need those words even more for my next event: the 3200.

It was my second event of the day, and I knew that I would have to fight hard for a spot in the divisional meet.

Despite my overall improving health, this qualifier meet happened to fall on one of those days when I wasn’t feeling well. After running an 800, I felt the dizziness and nausea all over again.

As the minutes passed, it didn’t seem like my pain would go away. In the last hour before that race, I resorted to giving myself a little pep talk in the bathroom stall.

“Not a spirit of fear,” I said aloud to myself, words barely above a whisper.

Maybe one day I would find the courage to speak those words loudly enough for the runner next to me to hear. But for now–for now I could listen to the murmurs of my voice in a near-empty stall, speaking aloud a truth so much bigger than anything I could write or say or think.

For now I could whisper God’s Word and let it stir my heart (See Hebrews 4:12).

For now I could whisper a prayer and let it calm the storm within my mind (See Philippians 4:7).

I prayed aloud and begged for my pain to disappear.

I begged for my pain to disappear, and suddenly I thought of that part of Hebrews 12:2:

“Jesus… who for the joy set before him endured the cross.”

And then I thought of the prayer on the Mount of Olives, when Jesus said, “Father, if you are willing, remove this cup from me” (Luke 22:42).

I looked at my pain, the smallest fraction of what my Savior had to endure. So small and insignificant that the fact that He even cares about it is life-changing.

Surely I could also say, “Nevertheless, not my will, but yours, be done” (Luke 22:42).

Surely I could endure.

I hadn’t come this far only to turn back now.

I walked out of that bathroom feeling a little braver.

Facing fears

The track has always scared me. Every time I wait for the gun to go off, I wonder what the race will be like. I wonder if, during those several laps, I will revert back to the spring of eighth grade, back to a time when anemia took away my strength and anxiety took away my joy and failure took away my confidence.

The track can be unforgiving. It forces me to wrestle with my past and my old insecurities.

But at the same time, it reveals to me that ways that God has transformed my heart and renewed my mind. Running has ultimately brought me closer to Him.

This 3200 race at the conference meet reminded me of that. It was one of those moments when I deeply felt a love for running and a love for life.

I felt like myself again, ready to embrace the thrill of the competition.

A sea breeze drifted in as the night arrived and the stadium lights lit up the track. I love the track in moments like this, when running down the stretch feels like running on air.

Not a spirit of fear, I said in my head over and over for the entirety of that race. Not a spirit of fear, I thought as I breathed in the cool air. But of power and of love and of a sound mind, I reminded myself when it felt hard.

I crossed that finish line with a season record. It was still 40 seconds from my PR, but it finally matched my usual freshman times.

And it was fast enough to give me a spot in the 3200 at the divisional meet.

I was rebuilding, brick by brick. Climbing the mountain again, step by step.

So I thank God for the five words that let me run free.

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